→ you don’t need more free time

“You cannot get more “weekend” simply by taking an extra day off work yourself. If we were to take more time off as individuals, we would be likely to spend that time, as the jobless do, waiting for other people to finish work. We are stuck “at work,” in a sense, by the work schedules of our family and friends.”

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I’ve been thinking about this a fair bit. A flexible job that allows weekend work for one partner whilst the other partner alternates looking after the kids seems like a good idea, but it just encourages us to solely work more and collectively spend less time together. There’s still something about the 9-5.

→increasing complexity

“We chose to increase the complexity of our lives by having children”

I found this article and diagram by Austin Kleon very insightful—as a five person household I now realize we have 12 10 relationships to manage. You can apply the same concept to work teams.

Even though I’m a big fan of simplicity, I don’t necessarily see our family complexity negatively, as Marcus in About A Boy says:

“Suddenly I realized – two people isn’t enough. You need backup. If you’re only two people, and someone drops off the edge, then you’re on your own. Two isn’t a large enough number.”

we tell stories to children for many reasons…

“We tell stories to children for many reasons, and if the goal is to teach them a moral lesson then one way to make the lesson more accessible to children is to use human characters. Yes, we should consider the diversity of story characters and the roles they are depicted in”

Patricia Ganea, from the University of Toronto on why having all the animals in most children’s books isn’t such a great idea after all.

if i had my child to raise over again…

“If I had my child to raise over again,

I’d finger paint more, and point the finger less.

I’d do less correcting, and more connecting.

I’d take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.

I would care to know less, and know to care more.

I’d take more hikes and fly more kites.

I’d stop playing serious, and seriously play.

I’d run through more fields, and gaze at more stars.

I’d do more hugging, and less tugging.

I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.

I’d build self-esteem first, and the house later.

I’d teach less about the love of power,

And more about the power of love.

It matters not whether my child is big or small,

From this day forth, I’ll cherish it all.”

→ Diana Loomans

hard times; easy choices

This is a talk I delivered at my local toastmasters club on Monday 17th July, 2017.

In the first four and a half months of this year I visited 10 cities in 4 countries, mostly for work, some for leisure.

In early May, in the midst of this whirlwind of movement, I visited my local library, as I often do, and I was drawn to this book: The Art of Stillness: adventures in going nowhere. I'm not sure why I was so drawn to the book but it ended up in a pile of books that I borrowed that day.

Continue reading hard times; easy choices

twenty years

Twenty years ago this evening my fifteen year old self went on my very first date with a lovely girl from my high school. Little did I know that night would change my life forever. Thanks for asking me out that night Kitty and thanks for a fantastic twenty years together. Here’s to the next twenty!