I’ve got a new type of wallet for the first time in my life. I’ve decided to ditch the bulky one with a zipper and coin purse I’ve had forever and change it to a simple card sleeve. I’ve moved every card I can into either Apple Pay or Stocard and I’ve just kept the essentials (driver’s license, Medicare card, health card and public transit card) that won’t work digitally. I have one physical credit card – although it’s backup for Apple Pay and I’m not sure I really need it. The centre holds couple of bank notes. I’m liking it already 😎
“Through this crazy experience, I discovered what is most important to me, and it’s not money or pretending to be something or someone I am not. Real, ordinary life with my family and friends was truly invaluable.
Sure, sometimes life can seem a bit mundane and boring after what I experienced, but that’s OK. Not everything in life needs to be totally exhilarating, and there’s a lot of joy to be found in normal, ordinary life.”
Dan Saunders who was jailed after spending $1.6 million from a secret ATM loophole #
This week’s challenge to myself: turn any negative fear of missing out (FOMO) thoughts into positive ‘joy’ of missing out (JOMO) thoughts.
“The most likely to fall into such pattern are those of us who aspire to bring our whole self to work. That attitude is admirable and often necessary. We want to be all in. But then we find ourselves being always on.”
“In most businesses, we seldom value pace. If you run fast today, you’re asked to run faster tomorrow, and so on. We know that resting, at least once in a while, will make us healthier and more productive…but we choose to keep going, regardless.”
Are You Sacrificing for Your Work, or Just Suffering for It?
Spending last week working and hanging out in Amsterdam was fun; here’s some observations from an Amsterdam/Netherlands newbie:
- I knew there would be bikes but I just didn’t realize just how many there would be. It’s a shame motorbikes and small cars (Canta’s) also share the dedicated bikeways.
- The tourist party scene full of “coffee shops”, mini casinos and sex in the city is alive and well, it’s just not my scene at all – rather disgusting.
- Riding a bike 10 mins from our hotel just south of the city centre means you can discover a windmill, the Amstel river, beautiful green countryside and a small goat farm. Riding outside the city center is much easier as there is less “traffic” and it’s still flat like the rest of Amsterdam.
- I noticed there’s rubbish and litter everywhere – some people just throw and leave rubbish and expect some other people to clean it up. The party scene makes this even worse.
- Someone tried to swipe my wallet in broad daylight – besides this I felt safe most of the time.
- Most of the prices were similar to Australia but in Euro instead of AUD which mean it was about 40% more expensive than home.
“A large part of efficient time management revolves around avoiding distractions. An ironic aspect of life is how easily we can be harmed by the things we desire. Fish are seduced by a fisherman’s lure, a mouse by cheese. But at least these objects of desire look like sustenance. This is rarely the case for us. The temptations that can disrupt our lives are often pure indulgences. None of us needs to gamble, or drink alcohol, read e-mail, or compulsively check social-networking feeds to survive. Realising when a diversion has gotten out of control is one of the great challenges of life.”
From the book The Organized Mind by Daniel J. Levitin
“Our brains are busier than ever before. We’re assaulted with facts, pseudo facts, jibber-jabber, and rumour, all posing as information. Trying to figure out what you need to know and what you can ignore is exhausting. At the same time, we are all doing more. Thirty years ago, travel agents made our airline and rail reservations, salespeople helped us find what we were looking for in shops, and professional typists or secretaries helped busy people with their correspondence. Now we do most of those things ourselves. We are doing the jobs of 10 different people while still trying to keep up with our lives, our children and parents, our friends, our careers, our hobbies, and our favourite TV shows.”
Why the modern world is bad for your brain
My father was suprised when I told him I am responsible to planning, booking and arranging all my own work travel: domestically and internationally. “Isn’t there a team of people who do that for you?” he asked. No there isn’t.
One of the best things about my weekend time is nature is forgetting about all that noise and just focusing on the present with my only concern being that I don’t fall straight off a cliff 🙀
The ever-useful German word ‘Torschlusspanik’: the feeling that the options are narrowing, that the boat is leaving, that you’re too old.
Alain de Botton at his finest
“You cannot get more “weekend” simply by taking an extra day off work yourself. If we were to take more time off as individuals, we would be likely to spend that time, as the jobless do, waiting for other people to finish work. We are stuck “at work,” in a sense, by the work schedules of our family and friends.”
I’ve been thinking about this a fair bit. A flexible job that allows weekend work for one partner whilst the other partner alternates looking after the kids seems like a good idea, but it just encourages us to solely work more and collectively spend less time together. There’s still something about the 9-5.
A growing list of traditional life pursuits are being found to have zero to only small correlations with happiness, well-being, and life satisfaction:
Beauty: ugly people are happy too.
Money: Materialism is inefficient.
Sunshine:Avoid really cold and dark places. Everything else is not much different
Education: Cheap education is the best education.
Children: Kids are for meaning and purpose. Friends and vacations are for happiness.
Choice: Simplify. Uncertainty feels bad, simplicity feels good.
Happier Human’s Hedonic Treadmill #
“My dad counsels people dealing with trauma and major anxiety, and once offhandedly mentioned a suggestion he gave to a client: When you’re out, look for people being nice to each other. Having sweet interactions. Look for friends getting coffee or a person holding open a door or strangers saying ‘how you doin’?’ or a dad kissing the top of his daughter’s head. And in Brooklyn, if you look for them, you get to see these tiny magic interactions everywhere. It’s gotten me through moments of secret darkness; it makes me well up with love for all these sweet, fragile, striving people around me; and for the gentle, kind man I learned it from.”
A comment left by a visitor to a blog
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship.
From the top 5 regrets of the dying – I’ve ordered the full book from the library
Related: Insane Work Hours
Technology means I’ve never felt more connected; it also means I’ve never felt more disconnected and alone. Connection enabled by technology is junk connectivity, and in the way junk food provides no nourishment, technology provides no fulfilling, deep human connection that we all need to thrive.
“The only true voyage would be not to travel through a hundred different lands with the same pair of eyes, but to see the same land through a hundred different pairs of eyes”
~ Marcel Proust
I like my morning ritual where most days I go for a walk or jog through the forest right by our house before logging on to work at home. I stick to the same path mostly (I vary it slightly depending on my cravings for exercise and/or nature), but the benefit of this is I get to see the same landscape over and over again, through the days and seasons. Some days I notice things I’ve never noticed before even thought I’ve been there hundreds of times before. And some days some amazing things happen, like when I see baby koalas, kangaroos and when like this morning a thick fog covers the entire forest.
Always do your best: your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgement, self-abuse and regret.
The fourth of the four agreements #
“Proficiency and the results of proficiency come only to those who have learned the paradoxical art of doing and not doing, of combining relaxation with activity, of letting go as a person in order to that the immanent and transcendent Unknown Quantity make take hold.”
~ Aldous Huxley
Via The Antidote by Oliver Burkeman – highly recommended